Winter has been particularly tough this year. I know, we say that EVERY year, but the sheer amount of snow, punishingly cold temperatures and torrential rain followed by a cold-snap-turning-everything-into-solid-rock-bordello has made 2018 a drag so far.

Then it’s February, that most dreaded month of the year when morale seems to be at an all-time low. We are all, if I may say so, simply fed up of this shit. So I turn to Ted Steele for a few pointers on how to survive this inglorious month. He says:

• After spending the month of December eating too much rich food, make lots of clear soups using chicken or veal bones. They are wonderfully restorative.

• Drink wines that evoke warmer times, like crisp whites and light reds; or wines from islands like Santorini or Sicily that are luminous.

• Pretend you’re in the Punjab and make curried chickpeas and Dahl. Spiciness helps you endure the cold.

• Buy the complete box set of The Sopranos and watch one season per Saturday and Sunday. You should finish most of it by end of February. Repeat in March if necessary. The couch will be your best friend.

• Take long walks in the woods with a mickey of single malt whiskey. The air is invigorating and the whiskey intoxicating.

• Choose a country you’ve always wanted to visit, buy a map of it, and stare at it until you are deeply mesmerized. This allows the mind to wander when the body cannot.

• There is very little light. So make some of your own by smoking weed and listening to Afrobeat and Roots Reggae. It will also make you smile incessantly.

• Read autobiographies on rock stars and poets who have led intense lives, like Patti Smith, Keith Richards or Charles Bukowski. Living the debauchery of others vicariously is good for the soul and easy on the liver.

• Learn a new craft, like baking bread (it warms up the house) or knitting (you make socks). It sharpens your brain and keeps your hands nimble.

• If you must travel, choose a warm destination free of douchebags and cartels. The beach is always an amazing remedy, especially when devoid of assholes and danger. Swim twice a day.

• Check out museums during off hours, like Tuesday mornings to avoid the crowds and school buses. Art is a very good way of reminding you that in times of desperation, there is hope. And beauty.

• Exercise if you must, but at home. Alone. This way you avoid the stare of judgmental people who are possibly better than you. You will enjoy the salty pearls of sweat on your brow.

• Call up long-lost friends who live abroad. Remind them that you are still alive and that you miss them. This stirs the heart and keeps your blood circulating vigorously.

• Avoid all social media for the month. Read Harper’s magazine instead and learn something new that really matters. The world will always benefit from enlightened people.

• Exchange positive perspectives on random subjects with a stranger on the bus or metro. You’ll be pleasantly surprised how most people react to spontaneous conversations. It stimulates and encourages curiosity.

• Hang out with your family and friends as much as possible during the month of February. Camaraderie always makes shitty times more bearable, and if all else fails, there is a certain pleasure in a communal bitch-fest. After all, misery loves company.

Good luck !